One of my personal favorite bloggers is Back Stage's Secret Agent Man. In the following post on his blog, Secret Agent Man poetically clarifies why good actors do bad things . . . and how it ends up sabataging all their best efforts and intentions.
I met Lucifer in a bar the other night, and he confessed that he
likes to put bad ideas in the heads of smart actors. Curious, I asked
why he did this. The author of all sin smiled. “Creative people annoy
me. Just look at the so-called great works of art that claim to capture
my image. You would be upset too.”
Lucifer had a point. The man in front of me wasn’t a horned monster
with a red tail. He actually looked a little like Jeremy Irons.
We ordered another round. My new friend went on to explain that
actors are especially open to suggestion because they’re such desperate
beings. “Convincing them to get in their own way requires little more
than a whisper in their ears.”
I was stunned. Actors are always cutting their own throats for no
apparent reason. Could the devil himself be the root of all that
self-destructive behavior?
Just last week, a client shocked me by ruining an opportunity I
created at her request. Clara, an established actor in her 40s, had been
begging me to get her in the room for one of her favorite TV shows. So
when the right part crossed my desk, I convinced the casting director to
give her a shot.
The show’s office was on the Universal lot, up in the Valley. Since
it was hard to find, casting sent me a detailed map with parking
directions. I told Clara to leave early, just to be safe.
After the audition, she was in a state of shock. Everything went wrong, and it was all her fault.
Here’s what happened. Clara barely glanced at the map before leaving
her home. She just assumed it would all make sense when she got there.
Well, it didn’t. Clara couldn’t find the right parking structure so she
left her car in the wrong place, a spot which was half a mile away from
the casting office. And this was on a summer afternoon when it gets past
100 degrees in the Valley.
So she arrived at the audition 20 minutes late, covered in sweat.
There was no time to waste because the director had to leave, so casting
rushed her into the office. Naturally, the audition didn’t go well, and
now it’s going to be a hundred times harder for me to get her back in
the room.
When I asked Clara why she had behaved in such an unprofessional manner, she wasn’t able to give me an honest answer.
I finished my drink and turned to Lucifer.
“Was that you?”
He grinned.
My mind started to race. I remembered the time I had to drop a young
client because he was badmouthing me in public. The idiot had been at a
workshop, waiting for his scene partner, when he decided to talk some
trash. A passing casting assistant heard him and called me in the
morning.
Then there was the time an actor followed me into a restaurant, interrupted my dinner, and begged me for a meeting.
And what about those clients who passed on auditions because they
didn’t think they were right for the parts? Why wouldn’t they allow the
casting director to make that decision?
Or worst of all, how about all the actors who write in to Backstage,
begging for a meeting with Secret Agent Man when they don’t even know
who I am or where I work?
Lucifer stood up. It was time to move on. He explained that Hollywood was keeping him busy.
I had to ask.
“Will I see you again?”
“Perhaps.”
As the Prince of Darkness strolled off into the night, I made a
mental note to pick up some holy water and a few crosses on my way home.
To see more of Secret Agent Man's blog posts, visit his site.
Are you listening to the angel or the demon sitting on your shoulders? Choose wisely!